Bamboozled

It’s been a while since I’ve posted about my mission to live a zero waste life, but behind closed doors the cogs have been turning! One of the things we’ve invested in was some bamboo toothbrushes from Ethical Superstore. Initially I was sceptical because although the simple look of theDarwin thing is part of it’s rustic appeal, when it arrived I suddenly thought “where is the ergonomic handle? Where are the bobbles to help me grip it in my paw and the tongue scrapey bit?” but on reflection, if you can’t push a brush round your mouth without an ergonomic handle, quite frankly natural selection is probably going to take you out fairly soon anyway.

It was a bit rough to start off with , but after a few goes we got along just fine and I definitely don’t find it any better or worse than the usual plastic kind – to be honest it’s hard to get too enthused over a toothbrush Still, can’t complain! It does literally exactly what it says! It Also matches my bathroom much more nicely than the neon green monstrosity that preceded it. The only slight drawback is that if you leave it in that foul cup that inhabits most bathrooms (you know the one, it contains twelve toothbrushes and a quarter of an inch of drool) it will start to biodegrade right there in the cup, so unless it’s in your pie hole, keep it dry!

bambrush

My next stop is toothpaste- I don’t fuck around when it comes to dental stuff, I was born with calcium deficiency and as such my early years were spent with someone quite often pulling bits out or chopping bits off my mouth, I’ll do anything to avoid a dentist these days. Some of the alternatives to toothpaste sound absolutely barking, like hydrogen peroxide (nope). Plus if I buy any more weird chemicals off the internet MI6 are going to parasail through my living room window and the cat might get out. This week I’ve already bought castor oil – Castor beans are what Walt uses to try to poison Gus Fring’s cigarette in Breaking Bad, and lye, which Forensic Files fans will know is quite often used to dissolve corpses. walterwhite-uproxx.jpg

No need to worry though , I’m only making soap (here’s looking at you, little FBI man in my webcam). I may even branch out to a video blog for that, it should be quite amusing to watch me splash about with corrosive chemicals in the kitchen.

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